I was on the phone with The Mister when my heart skipped multiple beats as I saw the empty parking lot where my car supposed to be parked. I exclaimed, ‘The car’s not here!’.
I was borderline frantic – ‘I couldn’t have parked anywhere else! This is where I park day in and out!’, I said in annoyance and anger when The Mister suggested if I had parked elsewhere. I walked rather clumsily down the slope to a lower level, and still no car.
The Mister probably thought, here we go, another Thara-moment but he calmly and courteously told me to try look in the level above my designated parking spot.
There, it was – clamped, because I had parked at another resident’s spot for three full days. After burning a RM200 hole in my pocket, unclamping and moving back the car where it belonged, I gave this incident a long thought.
A colleague turned friend pointed out, ‘Really, you thought it was stolen? Like what are the chances, considering the security and downright better options for cars to be hijacked at your place!’. Right – my logic reasoning must’ve shut-off involuntarily. Why was I even annoyed at The Mister for trying to suggest I look at a different level.
The great Master Oogway is absolutely right – ‘The mind is like water. When agitated, it becomes difficult to see. But if you allow it to settle, the answer becomes clear.’ Someone quoted this to me several months back, and suddenly it clicked to me. This has been the evil root to most of my tribulations, especially professionally, in the past year.
I got worked up unnecessarily. And man, was it exhaustive to live a life (read: work life) constantly in anger, dissatisfaction and having to be defensive. Although it was generally situations worth frowning upon, in some instances, there were simpler solutions and things were not that big of a deal as I’d thought.
I looked at it all as a big mountain to conquer, and lost myself in a massive plane crash of To-Do lists in my brain with emotional thunderstorms. These days I’m more (trying to be) calm and I look at things rather objectively.
This write up may not be one that you expected, a funny anecdote of how I lost my car. This is simply a reminder to myself (and others) who need to hear this : When it seems like the sky is falling on you, just take a step back, calm the shit down and look at the bigger picture. Don’t bark at people who’re simply trying to be of help. You’ll figure it out.
Also looking for career alternatives – you think I got what it takes to be a new age therapist. Hit me up for unsolicited advices and hard truths about life, Asian style.
I woke up, grateful for a mundane day. Amma called to check on me. I just rolled in bed, for an hour or so after that– meaningless morning blabbers with my e-boyfriend (hassle free subscription service, and premium members get surprise gifts!). It felt like ages since I had the luxury to decide what I wanted to do for the rest of the day.
I watched 2 episodes each of Totally Spies and HTGAWM on Netflix, with breaks to talk to my e-BF, grandparents, Papa & Cherima, and Keshie. Around 4pm, I ordered Chee Cheong Fun (because I was craving for haram food, but, Popiah Bunga Raya was sold out). When I came back in the house, the piling dishes in my kitchen sink guilt tripped me.
Amma called me again, casually asking what I was doing, and kept saying, ‘Ok, bye!’. It lowkey annoyed me, so I told her to keep talking to me. She mumbled something about being tired, and not napping that evening? She was clearly distracted, divided attention between her favourite daughter (hahaa!) and TV. Then the call ended abruptly. I grunted and continued washing my oats-stained mugs.
The doorbell rang… and there they stood! Amma, Acca and Ceci. I did not cry (my sister only took the video expecting tears, but pffftttt!) I just grinned, and really, my heart jumped in joy and grinned wide too.
For context, I should add this next paragraph.
The past four weeks were the toughest times I have endured in my life. I struggled more than I have ever had. I probably never worked as hard, or even had to be that resilient. Like ever. My spirits were not that beaten but trust me when I say that my circadian rhythm was so off-beat that even the world’s best choreographers couldn’t fix it. I barely slept 25 hours a week and came home just to shower after 36-40 hours workday only to return back.
My parents and e-BF were concerned, and behind my back, they discussed how I’m this little monster who gets angry when they don’t wake me up in time after my 2-hour naps, or sometimes, just-angry.
Having gone through that, truly, this was exactly what I needed. People sometimes overly-romanticize about being self-sufficient and independent – but sometimes, all you need is just Ohana. I even went to bed with a grin, knowing my parents were just 10 steps away in the next room.
It dawned upon me – I’m still that shamelessly needy child who told her parents to call her ‘Baby’ as a toddler and asked them to send me birthday cards while in university because it was always Final Exam week.
I have now rebooted. I have a sparkling clean house and heart full of joy and strength to take on the coming week! *sings Here We Go, Here We Go*
Since I started blogging in 2008, for 11 years now, I’ve been consistent at these TWO things; 1)Not be consistent at writing, and 2) Writing a blogpost in the month of December.
I realized that most, if not all my December blogs were about how the year went. So, I’m going to keep that tradition going this year too, because only then, I’ll credibly add ‘Writing Year-End Reflections’ in my list of consistencies. Amidst moving across three cities in 12 months – I felt 2019 flew by in a blink (also still certain somebody tweaked Time Machine).
This year was as eventful as 2018 – albeit the lack of awesomeness on my Instagram feed. The reason for that is my ‘digital detox’ endeavor in 2019. My attempt to stay away from social media did not last long enough though. But one good outcome from unistalling some apps and setting screen time limit is that now I feel lesser need to take pictures for Gram. Like a true millennial, I have a long way to go to strike a balance – let’s hope I work my way around it in 2020.
Professionally, it has been one hella packing-unpacking deal. I completed my first rotation down south in Johor in March. Then, I made a move further down south to Singapore for my ‘overseas’ rotation for 9 months. I saw and experienced things – at a much grander scale. Now, I’ve moved to Malacca – it’s been two weeks. In all of this, I’m glad that I met (have gotten to know more, this year) people my age from various backgrounds – how we are all different, but still the same. ASEAN curse word conventions, discussing brown parenting, learning new recipes, eating tasty home-cooked food (big hearty thanks to Uncle Manu and Mrs Manu) and and debating on random topics. I miss all this now that I’m in a place with only TWO other people.
Love life progressing on a steep gradient on our 5th Year of Woofness, as we call it. We finally lived in the same city since graduating in 2016, though for only 9 months. We had lots of fun gaining calories, exploring and failing to consistently go to gym. LDR sucks even if it’s just over 300 km yo! Our families met for the first time, and now warming up to each other’s family more. And…… we *cough* are *cough* getting *cough* married.
Personally, I could’ve done better with my New Year’s resolutions. I actually did read more this year (thanks to my book sponsor a.k.a The Mister!). I tried to limit single-use plastics – and jumped at every opportunity where I can spread the word among family members and colleagues. I saved more money than I have had since starting work. So that’s all good – I well deserve a Cheesy Wedges.
But…. I need to up my game in writing, healthy living, emotional intelligence and some other personal projects. To a more productive year in 2020. Looking forward to all the adventures that 2020 has in store.
If I described 2018 as a roller coaster ride, it’ll be shamefully an understatement. So, let me do it justice.
It was like going to Disneyland all smiles and glee, and then someone offered me a sack of gold coins for me to get on a ride. The ride made me nauseous, and I couldn’t get off halfway. I had this nagging passenger right next to me – who kept nagging and made me lose my mind. But what kept me going is the thought of that sack of gold coins and my cute little plushy which I had carried along in my pocket (which I beat up whenever I struggled on the ride). At the end of the first ride, I was so thrilled that it was over, and extremely grateful to sign up for another ride.
Okay laaa, that’s a bit drama. But now I feel I justified my 2018 chapter the right way.
So, like every year, I am going to summarize the highlights of my year. So, here we go, a reminiscent walk through my 2018 memories.
Crossing items on my 25 Before 25
I’m a big fan of New Year’s resolutions, always been one despite being not-so great at accomplishing them all the time. In 2018, however, I did not write any yearly resolutions. I resorted to completing my 25 Before 25 (which I will blog about soon!), a list I wrote when I was still doing my undergrad studies in UTP. It wasn’t a typical bucket-list of sorts with skydiving and all. It was a simple list of random things I wanted to do. Some of the things include :
Learning hand lettering
Volunteering for Build for Tomorrow
Watching Disney on Ice
Piercing for a second earring (my Amma isn’t a big fan of this!)
The list is about 80% complete. Obviously I’m cheating a little there, because I turned 25 last September. But I decided to give yours truly an extension until February 2019.
Completing my postgraduate studies
When I enrolled for my Masters program, I had one motto. Finish on time, on a high. I repeated that to myself; and in one way or another my close knits also kept me on my toes. I am more than exhilarated as I look back on my postgraduate journey. I think I did good. 🙂
Going into 2018, I told myself that I will look for another as soon as I completed my Masters. Two weeks into 2018, I was already looking at job ads like an addict. I applied for my current job circa January 2018.
5 months and 8 stages of selection later, I got the job along with 9 others from all over ASEAN coutries. It was a ASEAN Graduate Programme which requires us to switch roles at different locations for 2 years. Now I’m almost at the end of my first block. If I have to be frank, some days are tough. I climb 2-3 stories high monkey ladders. I get asked if I am an intern at least once a week. But I am grateful for this opportunity – to spend 2 years to look for what exactly I want, and learning from the best people along the way.
4. Living Alone
My life has changed 274.5 degrees with my new job. I have to relocate every 8 months for different roles. For my first block, I was deployed (chewaahh) to Johor. After graduating from UTP, I had lived at home for a year and half. Transitioning to living alone was a little nerve wrecking in the beginning. This was different from campus life (I had the bestest roommate ever!).
The first time I cooked nasi lemak for a Saturday lunch and sent my Amma a photo, she replied, ‘Where you buy from?’.
I bought scented candles, bought so much groceries (and throwing half of them, because I have no sense for expiry dates and portions). But living alone is not as miserable or pathetic as I imagined it to be! Sure, I do miss proper home-cooked meals. But living alone also teaches you a lot – like use a peg to dry your clothes so that your jeans don’t fly away from the 21st floor.
5. The Mister’s Grand Introduction
I made up my mind about this circa 2016. I will introduce The Mister to my parents in the best possible manner, even if that meant that I’ll have to wait a little longer. I wanted a proper introduction, and I wanted it all to be certain. So, just a couple of weeks before my graduation, I called Amma and told her that The Mister is coming for convocation and that she should tell my father.
I came out of the hall in jitters, saw The Mister standing with the family. Everyone just grinning sheepishly.
Little Twin : Achu, pass ah this Etta?
Acca : Does he watch football?
The Mister : *sheepishly nodding*
Acca : What team?
Me : MU.
Acca : Then okay, pass.
You see, mine’s a conventional Indian family. You can be 25 and still be anxious about having found a boy you like. I was just relieved that the cat was out of the bag after being in there, gasping for air for FOUR years (although later Acca sarcastically told Amma, ‘You think I don’t know anything ah? I know.’)
As I complete this write-up, it dawns upon me that every part of the highlights deserves a blog post each. I keep saying this at the end of almost every year, (and it’s always true!), but 2018 has been the most eventful year of my life *clears throat*, thus far.
Happy New Year to all who’s reading!
May we all have a better 2019, and all the strength in the world.
P/s: I have not been to any Disney parks, so that was purely fictional. But, no, that entire first paragraph felt so real as I typed it. 😛
I’m overwhelmed with pride and joy as I write this, even days after my convocation ceremony, months even, since I actually completed my postgraduate studies circa early June. Well, I have very solid reasons why I am singing praises for myself (this could be a good thing, no?).
Why I Signed Up for Postgraduate Studies?
Let me begin with why I signed up for a Master’s course. You see, I was not beaming with satisfaction as much during my convocation in UTP. I wasn’t graduating with the best of CGPA, and I wasn’t proud of where I stood. I have always taken pride being an academically accomplished student – and that sort of scarred my spirit. I had to correct that, before I moved on to better things (or so I thought). So, I did not overthink about starting my masters to heal Little-Miss-Achiever in me. She needed to know that she could do better and deep down she knew she was better. I went with Environmental Engineering, mostly because it made sense at that time – I was working as an Environmental Engineer, and I kind of liked the subjects during my final year major. I thought I wasn’t ready for a MBA.
The Journey Itself
You see, my journey completing this postgraduate studies within three semesters wasn’t an easy one. I had a full-time job in an MNC and tutored part-time, three nights a week. I did a mixed-mode Masters, so that meant I had both classes and dissertation to complete. Sometimes, I had classes from eight in the morning to six in the evening, on Sundays. I was doing this to prove my worth, so I wasn’t about to sail along classes just enough to graduate. I had to be at my best. Needless to say, it was exhausting. Some days I felt like not doing anything and sleep all day. I helped increase sale of Pringles, McDonalds and Goodday Honey Flavoured Milk (this is so good!). I also had a few cry baby episodes at home. I got touchy at the slightest comment. I was always whining about how tired I was to my mum, and justified my weight gain with tears. That was all the worse parts.
The better parts came when I was once again the sought-after person for assignments, and when my results came each semester. I am being extremely honest here, that was my high. I went on this journey wanting so badly to prove to myself (who am I kidding, also to others) that I was as capable as I pictured myself to be. It wasn’t all about CGPA or being smart per say, it was my redemption. I started this journey with a wrong mindset, I guess. But I ended it on a different note, with a refreshed sense of confidence, self-worth and desire to learn. Okay, maybe the desire to learn was extra because I paid for every credit hour with my hard-earned money and I made sure to make full use of every Ringgit. I enjoyed the assignments (although I was almost always doing it last minute – #somethingsneverchange). I enjoyed the discussions, insightful conversations with my classmates and lecturers. Kind words from my close knits refueled my energy and enthusiasm. It kept me going (one of the things).
That, and the constant nagging pep talk from The Mister who can be both a Sweet Angel or a Nasty Uncle. Here’s an anecdote that’ll help explain my previous statement. On the final days of my thesis submission, I was a complete mess. I had gone two days without sleep and was on leave to complete my thesis write-up. I was constantly calling The Mister (even when he was at work) and I cried about how tired I was and complained that the thesis ‘is not finishing’. I told I was going to extend for another semester – he was all nice and motivating, until at one point I got yelled at. He told me to either do it or extend the damn semester – stop whining (not his exact words, but you get the idea laa).
I drove to Starbucks in Petronas Solaris Serdang, bought two drinks, redeemed another AND completed my thesis write up. I had to pay extra for same-day binding and submitted my thesis 6 hours later than the deadline. You see, sometimes all we need is a little (or aggressive) push. Lucky (in this case) for me, The Mister seems to have found a complete operation manual on how I work. He succeeds, almost all the time (it doesn’t work when it comes to getting me be healthy, hahaaaa!).
A year and half equivalent to three semesters later, I was done! I graduated with a 3.73 CGPA, presented in a conference and got the Best Paper Award. I had left my previous job on the last week of final examination, which was a carefully engineered break for myself. I am glad that I went on this journey – and I am more than glad that it gave me countless opportunities – to meet the right people, to learn beyond academics and to make my parents (and close knits) proud of me.
Disclaimer: This write up may seem like I’m self-bragging, but I assure you that wasn’t my intention. I’d love to keep my trumpets in the closet, but I really feel like I owe it to myself, to be proud of me, and share this story in the honest possible manner.
I have a love-hate relationship with the ‘On This Day’ function on Facebook. Sometimes I screenshot and have a good laugh with The Mister. Other times, I cringe a little (okay, maybe a lot), when I read comments and posts of younger me. Today, however, I had all sorts of emotions flooding me. As I type this post, I am not even sure if I should be writing this post.
Back when I was in Primary One, we used to sit with our tables combined, six in a group. On my right, sat a boy whose name was S. He was one of my first friends in primary school. He had a sister, 3 years older, who was in my sister’s class, and maybe that’s how we actually became friends by default. To be honest, I do not remember any of the conversations we had, but we hung out a lot. It’s all blurry to me now.
Sometimes, his nose would bleed profusely. He’d have blood stains all over his uniform. It has happened more than once. Teachers would help him get cleaned, and I was always the one who was instructed to buy him some food from the canteen. In Standard 2, we no longer sat beside each other. But, we’d still play with erasers, go for our prefects’ duties, leave class early for recess, together.
He shifted school in Primary 4, and I did not see him again till Primary 6. We met at the Leadership Camp for all primary head prefects from schools in Kuala Lumpur. He always jokingly said then, ‘Kalau aku kat SKSD, mesti aku tak jadi Ketua Pengawas’. After that, I sometimes met him in one competition or the other. The last time I met him in person was during a career competition in Form 4.
We became Facebook friends, and we’d randomly comment on each other’s post. We religiously wished each other on birthdays. We’d chat on Facebook messages, very rarely, but when we did, it’d be long conversation over nothings. He was one of those old friends, whom I was really glad to catch up with, but one who doesn’t cross my mind on ordinary days.
And in 2012, on June 13th, I signed in on Facebook, and posted him birthday wishes, like I had been in the past few years. Then, this happened..
I called my Mum, and cried that night. Today, another one of his random comments on Facebook popped up. Every time it happens, I somehow involuntarily relive that night, the night when I read that devastating comment on Facebook.
Remember that night, when we were in the car heading to grandparents’ in Bahau. You were fast asleep in the car, when the Acca suddenly pressed the brake. You fell down, and hit your face on the car seat, and you cried in pain. Acca said, a cow drove recklessly. You just nodded, and sat through the rest of the journey imagining a 4 legged animal driving a red car. A driving cow made your lips bleed.
No, Thara. Cows don’t drive cars. And the Moon doesn’t play hide and seek with you.
Dear 8 Year Old Self,
Remember that girl in school everyone made fun of, because she wasn’t quite right in the head? You too, did the same. You used to walk away if she sat somewhere near you inthe canteen or assembly. You thought she smelled funny. You even laughed about it with your friends. But she was always smiling, greeting everyone. Until, one day, she just wasn’t coming to school anymore. Teachers said she shifted to a different school, with a special class.
A few years later, you’ll see her, clad in secondary school uniform, walking with her mother by the road. She smiles as she walked by. You sat in the car, with heaved heart and teary eyes. She was just trying to make friends. You should’ve been nice.
Dear 12 Year Old Self,
You thought you had it all. In fact, you felt superior to your peers. You were the school topper, Head Prefect, and you knew that the 2005 Tokoh Pelajar Award had your name written all over it. You enjoyed being in the limelight. And you just knew, you were destined for bigger things.
You didn’t know then that all the medals and certificates you took pride in would mean nothing to your purpose in life. And do not lend your books, especially Harry Potter to others! It’s funny how you were so clueless, yet confident and snobby.
Dear 16 Year Old Self,
By now, you learned that the world revolves around everything, but only you. When you get your exam results, you convince yourself, if you could do this good even without even trying hard, imagine what could happen if you worked as hard. That’s your recent area of expertise. To convince yourself, to come up with reasons and excuses. You aren’t doing as good you ought to, but you aren’t doing bad either? You had great friends, you were in the Top 10. You’ve still got some limelight, although you’re not in centre stage.
You just know that if only you put in some work, you’ll ace many things in life. Well, lemme just tell you, you never got around doing much. Neither did you become a freelance writer, nor did you become a Toastmaster. Nope, not even a scholarship. Maybe, I was meant to be just an averagekinda person? Good bye, 12 Year Old Thara.
Dear 20 Year Old Self,
One day, the only friend from school that you have on campus told you, ‘You’ve changed ahhh’. You used to put yourself first, before anything else’. Her words would be a knock in your head, how you used to love yourself. You would never do anything to harm/hurt your precious self. But you chose to ignore, just brushing off her comments. You just chose to not see things as they were. You got name called behind your back. People were talking. You were just not bothered. After all, they don’t know what was the real situation.
You were just covering up with other good things. You had just won a national competition. You were reading more than before. Your grades were falling, but you could do better if only you tried right? Just so you know, you were wrong. You should’ve listened to your sane self. Oh, and that boy who bought you soup noodles when you were sick? He will mean more to you, than just a friend with car.
Every bit of experiences you’ve had, has made you the person that you are now. That said, none of those define who you will be as a person. Maybe it’s time you dig up all your To-Do’s and little projects you had in mind, and get started.
No, you don’t need 12 hours of sleep on the only weekend you’ll have off until the semester’s over in January. You got this, girl!
This week marked my seventh month on my first very ‘real’ job after graduating (if you don’t count my Dobby moments in the Nair household). I finally got my permanent name tag instead of the laminated ‘Probationary Pass’. I had my salary adjusted for confirmation. I undoubtedly learned more things in the past seven months than I would have in two academic semesters. So, what brings me to write this is the monkey which lives in my mind, constantly creating problems and stirring thoughts. So, here it goes, expectations versus reality of my first job.
1.Trust me, I am an engineer.
Graduating from one of the top engineering schools in the country, surviving through lots of projects and papers, 8 months of internship (mine was 9 months, mind you, because my supervisor loved me plenty and asked me to extend, and later enslaved me with documentation for that extra month), I thought I finally was ready for work. *Too long of a sentence, that I missed my point there.* So, the point is that after graduating, I kinda thought that I am finally this engineer who’s ready to take on the world. That little bubble I was in got crushed soon after. When a 56 year old operator uncle with less than high school qualification explains about wastewater treatment processes to you, and you’re trying not to look too confused, that was the end of ‘Trust me, I am an engineer’.
My first job has taught me that to trust myself as an engineer takes years and years of experience. Trust me not yet, I am learning to be an engineer.
2. I will be rich.
When I was younger *clears throat*, I used to think that engineers earned a lot. During final year, in that annual career fair, they distributed a book, ‘Salary Guide in Malaysia 2016‘. I merely rolled my eyes as I saw the figures, thinking graduating from a school with wild boars, pontianaks and drugs would land me higher income anyways *insert haha*. Well, news! That salary guide happen to be true. PTPTN started sending blackmail emails. I had to pay for that red car that brings me around. I decided to continue with school. I have to pay RM 5 for company’s Sports Club. On my first payday, I was happy. I splurged on myself and others. These days I just watch my bank balance shrinking within 4 days of payday. I’m caught between saving and spending. I’m not poor, no. But I kinda thought I’ll be richer?
My first job has taught me the truth behind, “You’ll only know the value of money when you start earning it yourself”. Yes, guys, Amma is almost always right.
3. Pursuing Passion
I wrote a complete list of what I wanted to do after graduating. From dance classes, to picking up my bow and violin again, to learning new languages, freelance writing, teaching tuition classes, and list goes on and on. What really happened was, I got home from work, showered and slept before 9 pm. The last time I completed a book I picked up was in January. I slept at any chance I got. I can sniff your mockery, Rice! Well, it’s a bit unfair for me to say that my first job made me lose my passion. I also have an equal share for procrastination and being lazy, I must say. It’s just that 9-5 drains me both mentally and physically. All I want to do is to hit the bed at the end of the day. In the past week, I’ve been improving slightly, solely because I have no other choice.
My first job taught me why most adults become boring people. They are just tired. If I wanted more out of life, I must stop whining and work for it.
4. I’ll be lovin’ it.
What do engineers do? Wear coveralls (I have a thing for coveralls, idk why!), work on site, do calculations and stuff, right? Some days I spend hours to decide on where to strategically locate all the tong sampahs in Operations area. I spend hours preparing slides for presentation and writing summary reports. On my lucky days, I get to learn about processes and think hard about improving environmental performance. Some days, I lie in bed dreading as I watch the alarm ringing. On Sunday nights, as I iron my uniform, I mourn for myself. Am I going to be doing this for the next 30 years? The idea that this is the person I am going to have to be taunts me. Is it the same in other organisations or am I the unlucky one? I don’t know what seems to be the problem, me or my job, or both. And then, out of the blue, some days I just wake up excitedly for work. It’s like my mind zaps from one channel to another. It’s probably symptoms of quarter life crisis. One day, I blurted out to my uncle, ‘You told us to study hard to land a good job. But look at me now’. He answered, ‘You have a good job. I don’t see a problem’. I just kept quiet, rethinking my life choices.
My first job has taught me how much I should have appreciated campus life. You see, no one could thumb in on your behalf on your bad days. You just have to suck it up and turn up for work.
This piece is vastly inspired by my current phase of life, obviously. I don’t mean to state that your first job would be a grief (I’m not even sure if mine is, actually). Some people seemed to be genuinely happy. Whether you love it or don’t, just remember it’s just a phase. Try to learn as much as possible, wherever you are. We will all see better days. We will, right?
I’m amongst millions of people on planet Earth who thinks it’s imperative to write down my resolutions as the new year dawns. Some years, I even plan weeks ahead, strategizing my resolutions, planning how in the upcoming 365-ish days I will become this person worth being a TEDex presenter. I soon came to realize how some of my resolutions were repetitive year after year, reflecting how ‘progressive‘ I was. New year’s resolutions can be likened to making babies; it’s easier to make them but keeping up with them could be the exact reverse *awkward pause*.
This year, I resorted to analyse why I keep breaking these few resolutions of mine, and attempt them in a different approach. Here’s the final results of my analysis :
Resolution #1 : To lose weight.
On the first week of the year, I will browse through every weight loss article online, trying to plot my way to be Deepika Padukone look alike within 3 weeks. Then, I tell myself that next week I’d start running 5 km daily, eat healthy, reduce carbs and etc. I once ate mashed cauliflower for a week, eventually when life got busy, I ended up munching on potato chips for lunch. I never did ever get on the treadmill.
Lesson Learned : It’s a PROCESS. Start slowly, but be consistent. Eat healthy and work out to your capacity. Do some research to help you through the journey. Like the one below, not very community friendly though.
Resolution #2: To be part of the 5 a.m. Club
This one has been on my resolution list since I was 14 when I sat watching The Opera Show on TV. On the show, they discussed about successful people who woke up early in the morning and how it led to their success. I have my alarms set to ring from 4 a.m. just so that I could snooze every one of them and go to bed. Some days when I’m on my disciplined mode, I used to wake up at 5 a.m., revising, reading or writing. This too usually does not last. On the days I had to go to bed late, I console myself to tarnish my 5 a.m Club attendance.
Lesson Learned : I think this was on my resolution list solely because I thought it’d be cool if I was in the 5 a.m. Club. I wasn’t really convinced about this theory. Yes, it’s always a good thing to follow the leads of successful people. But, if you do not truly believe in something, it’s not worth pursuing. In 2017, I’m not carrying on with the 5 a.m club resolution.
Resolution #3: To be happy.
Well, I am a happy person. I have not faced great tragedies in life. But, I always wrote this on my resolution lists because I thought I needed black and white announcement to myself. I never scratched this one from the list every single year I wrote it. I kept believing better things will unfold as the new year comes.
Lesson Learned : Resolutions needs to be clear, better if measurable or quantifiable. Happiness is an ongoing process that has no deadline. This year I resorted to listing down all the important things in my life, making a mind map to what I wanted to accomplish for every one of them.
Resolution #4: To make the scar on my forehead fade.
I think my parents are most concerned when this resolution never get crossed year after year. The scar on my forehead is self-inflicted. If I were to say that it’s skin picking disorder, certain person would roll their eyes saying that I am developing the scar just so that I could tell this cool story. *rolls eyes* But when you’ve been doing something for almost all your life, it’s hard to stop. I pick on my forehead when I read, write, study, sleep or when I’m just bored or zoning out.
Lesson Learned : Bad habits are hard to break. Very hard, may I add? But it’s not impossible. Quoting my skin doctor, “You just need little bit of cream and lots of discipline.” I am currently making the best progress ever that is even surprising to my parents.
So, learning from these four recurring resolutions, I think I made better resolutions this year. Hope this helps you to reflect on some of your always-broken resolutions (opppss! if I am the only one with broken resolutions). Do comment below on some of your resolutions, or how you broke or achieved your 2016 list.
*raises imaginary glass for all your resolutions (and mine) to work this year!*