When I was twelve, the new head teacher made all the girl prefects wear long skirts as uniform. On the day I walked to receive my badge as Head Girl, I tripped and fell in the assembly.
Months later, I was wearing a green baju kurung Kedah on Hari Anugerah Cemerlang. I tripped on the steps, while climbing on stage to receive the Tokoh Pelajar award.
At the age of 15, I would’ve tripped at almost every drain around the school. While in university, when I used to ride my bicycle to classes and library. On my way back, I would lose control downhill near the road between V1 and V2; and have fallen more times than I could admit. I drop my phone 3 times a day, (still).
My mother still nags me to be careful at work. When I tell her I climb tall structures, she worries. My safety helmet has saved me from knocking into pipes multiple times. By now, I must’ve convinced you what a clumsy, Humpty Dumpty I am.
So, just like my mother, The Mister has been self-appointed to point out (and nag me) about my clumsiness. He shrugs every time my phone takes a plunge, or and give me the I-told-you-to-be-careful look when I trip.
But, guess who broke the screen of their 3-month-old Huawei P30 Pro just TWO days before the warranty ended? Which brings us to why does The Mister has a new phone in the first place? Because his previous less-than-a-year-oldSamsung also had his screen cracked.
Happy face because he has a screen insurance for SGD46 to break it for ONE more time!
‘It’s because you are lazy’. That’s what The Mister said, when we started brisk walking at the Neighbourhood Park. We had just climbed three flight of stairs to get to the park; and I was already panting as if I ran a marathon (not like I have the experience of that). He insisted that we should jog, ‘Come, slowly, jog!’.
I maintained that I cannot jog, my ankle hurt and I might die of shortness of breath.
‘But you cycled in the gym last time! You used to run, you can jog! You’re just lazy!’. Bugger called me lazy. Twice! I had enough.
‘When I say I can’t jog, that means I CANNOT’. I walked away, angrily, made 2 rounds in the park, still walking briskly, mentally mocking him and gave laser stares each time I passed by him. My Amma nags me much lesser than this man!
Two days later, we went for a jog, again. We set rules this time; that I will jog to the best of my ability and that he’ll be considerate and nice(r) while at it. I did try to jog; and we completed about 1.8 km of jogging before I gave up. Frankly, I could’ve continued. But I just didn’t feel like pushing it? So, I used my ‘side stitch’ excuse to get away. Maybe I was just lazy?
Oh, the shame I feel typing this.
Earlier this week, The Mister casually commented, ‘You don’t read OR write these days, ah?’ I pretended not to hear that, sailed on to a different topic. I’m ninja like that when it comes to avoiding anything uncomfortable.
I did not think much of it all, until earlier today, while trying to not regurgitate the yucky lunch I was having. Maybe there’s truth to it. I am being a little lazy? I have been slacking in many ways, relatively. I have the luxury of time these days, but I do nothing (other than rolling chapatis 3-4 times a week).
To all this, I had one very good excuse. I was still settling in a new country. That takes time, right? Duhhh. But, if I must be honest, I was already well-adjusted at work. And, really, it just feels like I live in an alternate universe where Malaysia has better public transportation and crappy banking app. Everything else feels the same? So, that excuse went down the drain now because transition was smooth.
The whole point to this is that I realized, that sometimes, in life, we might need someone who gives us a reality check. To be that mirror reflecting on things you and I would delusional-y ignore or avoid. Fortunately (sometimes unfortunately), that person for me is The Mister.
I realized how this is a sticky situation, because that means, mostly, I cannot get away with pity or long-winded stories with The Mister. He points out things as they are, and that’s just not so romantic, I must say.
Sometimes, I get oh-so-defensive about the little stuffs, but when I’m all alone eating yucky lunch (yucky lunch is an important variable, you guys!), his valid points somehow make sense.
Sometimes, I get that much defensive, that I make it a point to prove against whatever he has said. Like today, I am writing a blog post while eating fruit salad for dinner, after a 3.2 km run on a weekday!
Lazy, who? Sorry?
I managed to run that same route, TWICE, today.
BUT, I have to also confess, I needed motivation to complete my mission; so I consoled myself that if I did run better, I would give me a reward. So……
No, I’m not eating fruit salad for dinner. Korean Fried Chicken! ❤
If I described 2018 as a roller coaster ride, it’ll be shamefully an understatement. So, let me do it justice.
It was like going to Disneyland all smiles and glee, and then someone offered me a sack of gold coins for me to get on a ride. The ride made me nauseous, and I couldn’t get off halfway. I had this nagging passenger right next to me – who kept nagging and made me lose my mind. But what kept me going is the thought of that sack of gold coins and my cute little plushy which I had carried along in my pocket (which I beat up whenever I struggled on the ride). At the end of the first ride, I was so thrilled that it was over, and extremely grateful to sign up for another ride.
Okay laaa, that’s a bit drama. But now I feel I justified my 2018 chapter the right way.
So, like every year, I am going to summarize the highlights of my year. So, here we go, a reminiscent walk through my 2018 memories.
Crossing items on my 25 Before 25
I’m a big fan of New Year’s resolutions, always been one despite being not-so great at accomplishing them all the time. In 2018, however, I did not write any yearly resolutions. I resorted to completing my 25 Before 25 (which I will blog about soon!), a list I wrote when I was still doing my undergrad studies in UTP. It wasn’t a typical bucket-list of sorts with skydiving and all. It was a simple list of random things I wanted to do. Some of the things include :
Learning hand lettering
Volunteering for Build for Tomorrow
Watching Disney on Ice
Piercing for a second earring (my Amma isn’t a big fan of this!)
This slideshow requires JavaScript.
The list is about 80% complete. Obviously I’m cheating a little there, because I turned 25 last September. But I decided to give yours truly an extension until February 2019.
Completing my postgraduate studies
When I enrolled for my Masters program, I had one motto. Finish on time, on a high. I repeated that to myself; and in one way or another my close knits also kept me on my toes. I am more than exhilarated as I look back on my postgraduate journey. I think I did good. 🙂
Going into 2018, I told myself that I will look for another as soon as I completed my Masters. Two weeks into 2018, I was already looking at job ads like an addict. I applied for my current job circa January 2018.
5 months and 8 stages of selection later, I got the job along with 9 others from all over ASEAN coutries. It was a ASEAN Graduate Programme which requires us to switch roles at different locations for 2 years. Now I’m almost at the end of my first block. If I have to be frank, some days are tough. I climb 2-3 stories high monkey ladders. I get asked if I am an intern at least once a week. But I am grateful for this opportunity – to spend 2 years to look for what exactly I want, and learning from the best people along the way.
4. Living Alone
My life has changed 274.5 degrees with my new job. I have to relocate every 8 months for different roles. For my first block, I was deployed (chewaahh) to Johor. After graduating from UTP, I had lived at home for a year and half. Transitioning to living alone was a little nerve wrecking in the beginning. This was different from campus life (I had the bestest roommate ever!).
The first time I cooked nasi lemak for a Saturday lunch and sent my Amma a photo, she replied, ‘Where you buy from?’.
My first nasi lemak! I even made the effort to plate it nicely.
I bought scented candles, bought so much groceries (and throwing half of them, because I have no sense for expiry dates and portions). But living alone is not as miserable or pathetic as I imagined it to be! Sure, I do miss proper home-cooked meals. But living alone also teaches you a lot – like use a peg to dry your clothes so that your jeans don’t fly away from the 21st floor.
5. The Mister’s Grand Introduction
I made up my mind about this circa 2016. I will introduce The Mister to my parents in the best possible manner, even if that meant that I’ll have to wait a little longer. I wanted a proper introduction, and I wanted it all to be certain. So, just a couple of weeks before my graduation, I called Amma and told her that The Mister is coming for convocation and that she should tell my father.
I came out of the hall in jitters, saw The Mister standing with the family. Everyone just grinning sheepishly.
Little Twin : Achu, pass ah this Etta?
Acca : Does he watch football?
The Mister : *sheepishly nodding*
Acca : What team?
Me : MU.
Acca : Then okay, pass.
You see, mine’s a conventional Indian family. You can be 25 and still be anxious about having found a boy you like. I was just relieved that the cat was out of the bag after being in there, gasping for air for FOUR years (although later Acca sarcastically told Amma, ‘You think I don’t know anything ah? I know.’)
Round table interrogation by the senior council members. 😛
____________________________________________
As I complete this write-up, it dawns upon me that every part of the highlights deserves a blog post each. I keep saying this at the end of almost every year, (and it’s always true!), but 2018 has been the most eventful year of my life *clears throat*, thus far.
Happy New Year to all who’s reading!
May we all have a better 2019, and all the strength in the world.
P/s: I have not been to any Disney parks, so that was purely fictional. But, no, that entire first paragraph felt so real as I typed it. 😛
Regardless of age and background, we see EVERYONE hooked up to their smartphones anywhere and anytime. This newfound connectivity to the world has probably blinded us from basic etiquettes. In some instances, I find that people are so ignorant about what is okay and what is not, when it comes to using smartphones and social media platforms.
Some time ago, I scrolled down my Facebook feed to find a post by one of my friends, about her literally dying father. She had posted a video of her father, bedridden, just about to be unplugged of his life support. ‘He passed a few minutes later.’, she mentioned at the end of the post. People taking pictures of their unconscious loved ones in hospital, live streaming the final rites of a funeral are all far too common these days. Other things that I find questionable (or get very annoyed at) are browsing through social media, or even just playing with your phones in the cinema. We disregard the comfort of other audiences with the light from our screens because everyone else are also using their phones?
We watch videos out loud in public places. We take pictures of random cute toddlers unbeknown to their guardians. We screenshot pictures of a ‘good-looking’ person to circulate (who am I kidding, to sexualize la) in WhatsApp groups – uploading a picture on social media DOES NOT EQUAL granting permission for every idiot to download the picture!
So much for freedom of speech, we misunderstand that mean comments and cuss words are approved. A pregnant social media influencer does a photoshoot with heels, and every Tom, Dick and Harry (or Jane, Jill and Jennifer, if you’re that kinda feminist), goes on to comment of how she was being irresponsible and could hurt herself and her baby. Celebrities probably have it worse – everything one say or do comes under scrutiny.
Recently, I read the most hilarious response from the South Indian actor, Siddharth to one such know-it all – who reprimanded the actor for saying RIP instead of Om Shanti in his tweet regarding passing of a renowned lyricist.
I literally LOL-ed at his response – well deserved!
Ten years back, these situations would have been considered outrageously insensible. Just because we have the means to take these pictures and videos, or type comments at so much convenience, we forget that there should be some boundary (and possibly a little common sense).
There is no definite guideline to what can or cannot be done. But sometimes, maybe we should all take a step back and be more mindful about how we use our smartphones.
Twisting wise words from Spiderman, ‘With a techie phone, comes great responsibility.’
What else, in your opinion, is unacceptable when it comes to social media and smartphones? Do share your thoughts with me! 🙂
Note : This blog post is part of my 30 Days Microblog Challenge which I began in September 2018 (and continued in November, because I left it at Day 7 in September!). To read more from this series, you can select ‘Microblog’ under Category. Or, search for #therainbowhatmicroblogs on Instagram. 🙂 Topics for this series are a mix of my own brainchild and prompts from my Insta-friends.
I’m overwhelmed with pride and joy as I write this, even days after my convocation ceremony, months even, since I actually completed my postgraduate studies circa early June. Well, I have very solid reasons why I am singing praises for myself (this could be a good thing, no?).
Why I Signed Up for Postgraduate Studies?
Let me begin with why I signed up for a Master’s course. You see, I was not beaming with satisfaction as much during my convocation in UTP. I wasn’t graduating with the best of CGPA, and I wasn’t proud of where I stood. I have always taken pride being an academically accomplished student – and that sort of scarred my spirit. I had to correct that, before I moved on to better things (or so I thought). So, I did not overthink about starting my masters to heal Little-Miss-Achiever in me. She needed to know that she could do better and deep down she knew she was better. I went with Environmental Engineering, mostly because it made sense at that time – I was working as an Environmental Engineer, and I kind of liked the subjects during my final year major. I thought I wasn’t ready for a MBA.
The Journey Itself
You see, my journey completing this postgraduate studies within three semesters wasn’t an easy one. I had a full-time job in an MNC and tutored part-time, three nights a week. I did a mixed-mode Masters, so that meant I had both classes and dissertation to complete. Sometimes, I had classes from eight in the morning to six in the evening, on Sundays. I was doing this to prove my worth, so I wasn’t about to sail along classes just enough to graduate. I had to be at my best. Needless to say, it was exhausting. Some days I felt like not doing anything and sleep all day. I helped increase sale of Pringles, McDonalds and Goodday Honey Flavoured Milk (this is so good!). I also had a few cry baby episodes at home. I got touchy at the slightest comment. I was always whining about how tired I was to my mum, and justified my weight gain with tears. That was all the worse parts.
The better parts came when I was once again the sought-after person for assignments, and when my results came each semester. I am being extremely honest here, that was my high. I went on this journey wanting so badly to prove to myself (who am I kidding, also to others) that I was as capable as I pictured myself to be. It wasn’t all about CGPA or being smart per say, it was my redemption. I started this journey with a wrong mindset, I guess. But I ended it on a different note, with a refreshed sense of confidence, self-worth and desire to learn. Okay, maybe the desire to learn was extra because I paid for every credit hour with my hard-earned money and I made sure to make full use of every Ringgit. I enjoyed the assignments (although I was almost always doing it last minute – #somethingsneverchange). I enjoyed the discussions, insightful conversations with my classmates and lecturers. Kind words from my close knits refueled my energy and enthusiasm. It kept me going (one of the things).
That, and the constant nagging pep talk from The Mister who can be both a Sweet Angel or a Nasty Uncle. Here’s an anecdote that’ll help explain my previous statement. On the final days of my thesis submission, I was a complete mess. I had gone two days without sleep and was on leave to complete my thesis write-up. I was constantly calling The Mister (even when he was at work) and I cried about how tired I was and complained that the thesis ‘is not finishing’. I told I was going to extend for another semester – he was all nice and motivating, until at one point I got yelled at. He told me to either do it or extend the damn semester – stop whining (not his exact words, but you get the idea laa).
I drove to Starbucks in Petronas Solaris Serdang, bought two drinks, redeemed another AND completed my thesis write up. I had to pay extra for same-day binding and submitted my thesis 6 hours later than the deadline. You see, sometimes all we need is a little (or aggressive) push. Lucky (in this case) for me, The Mister seems to have found a complete operation manual on how I work. He succeeds, almost all the time (it doesn’t work when it comes to getting me be healthy, hahaaaa!).
A year and half equivalent to three semesters later, I was done! I graduated with a 3.73 CGPA, presented in a conference and got the Best Paper Award. I had left my previous job on the last week of final examination, which was a carefully engineered break for myself. I am glad that I went on this journey – and I am more than glad that it gave me countless opportunities – to meet the right people, to learn beyond academics and to make my parents (and close knits) proud of me.
Disclaimer: This write up may seem like I’m self-bragging, but I assure you that wasn’t my intention. I’d love to keep my trumpets in the closet, but I really feel like I owe it to myself, to be proud of me, and share this story in the honest possible manner.
Almost exact representation of my emotions completing this journey. 😛
If I am a philosophical and oh-so cliché type, I would start this post by saying ‘Change is the only constant.’. But I would not do that, obviously. *inserts hahaa!* Fair to say, I have not gone through major unexpected events in life (I have seen people had it worst). As I thought about writing this, it came to me that I could classify the changes that happened to me into two; 1) Expected, generic changes and 2) Conscious change – when I made up my mind to change something.
Honestly speaking, tougher of the two is making a conscious decision to change. I’m not going to lie, I have had my fair share of struggles with this. Be it leaving a relatively well-paid job to join a graduate trainee program, enrolling in postgraduate studies full time while working a full-time job, moving on from the worst mistake of my life, and even deciding to stop sucking my fingers and scarring my forehead, it was all WORK. What helped me most in these transitions are three things, conscious self-reminder to be resilient, supportive circle of close knits and lots of information.
Resilience
Resilience, I think, is something that we must work on. In the face of challenges or adversities, don’t uggghhh too soon. Be solution-focused instead of problem focused (I’m working on this!). December last year, I discovered this book called ‘Who Moved My Cheese’ by Spencer Johnson. I liked this book so much that I bought 3 copies of the book for my friends. It is a story of 2 mice and 2 people who live a in maze, looking for cheese – I bet you’d find it an easy read.
2. Seek for Support
Always confide in and discuss your thoughts with people you’re close with. I was lucky enough that I’ve had people around me knocking my head, slapping me with hard reality and being supportive sweethearts. Don’t beta yourself up feeling weak, because sometimes we all need *sings* somebody to lean on!
3. Gather Information
Look for enough information about the situation that has changed. I am big on researching, no matter how petty a matter is. It is always consoling to understand what you’re going to face (are facing) especially if it’s a new job, new project or even a new romantic partner. If research tells you no-good news, then at least you know now! Be prepared for the worst – this goes back to #1, be resilient.
When I gradually stopped my skin-picking habit (I self-diagnosed myself with skin-picking disorder before my dermatologist did! See, research helps.), I was not used to looking at my face without that scar on my forehead. Some days, I’d just pick on my skin at the same spot, just to feel that comfort (stop rolling your eyes, Mister!). That’s how changes haunt us sometimes, like something’s not right. BUT, it’s just a phase, you’d get through it. Because… change is the only constant! 😉
Note : This blog post is part of my 30 Days Microblog Challenge which I began in September 2018. To read more from this series, you can select ‘Microblog’ under Category. Or, search for #therainbowhatmicroblogs on Instagram. 🙂 Topics for this series are a mix of my own brainchild and prompts from my Insta-friends.
I was clad in my baju kurung school uniform that day, with ever messy short hair. We had just won a round of debate, and I was named the ‘Best Speaker’ despite perpetually saying ‘people under them’ instead of subordinates or employees throughout my speech in that round. Our debate-guru (in bold), Puan Kalai, shook her head after session and said, ‘Jo, what is ‘people under them?’. It was the 8th National English Debate Competition, we were supposed to compete in 4 four preliminary rounds.
In the next round, we were competing against a Chinese private school from Sabah. Being the young and dumb bunch that we were, we thought that the round should be easy, siding us. The motion for the round was something to do with ‘Imposing Environmental Labels on Consumer Products’. We were to oppose the motion. As the debate heated, we realized that ‘Government’ team had pretty good speakers. They pretty much were kicking our dumb bottoms.
One of them were saying how environmental labelling is important to educate people to recycle. I raised my hand confidently to rebut. ‘You see, this bottle here *whilst lifting the plastic bottle up for more effect* has no environmental labelling. But we still know that it needs to go in the Plastic recycling bin. What’s the use for labels?’. The other speaker also lifted up the bottle, and said, ‘Madam, would you turn the bottle upside down? Do you see the recycling symbol stamped at the bottom? That’s environmental labelling’. I said, ‘Oh, okay!’ and sat down.
Others in the room laughed. I wanted to hide under the table. Team from the girls’-school with a street name lost that round. Much to my embarrassment, this incident has since replayed like a thousand times in staff room, classrooms and our Literary & Debating Society meetings.
This probably wasn’t a significant, life-changing event in my life, but somehow, the memory of the day carried on with me over the years. Just days ago, our super-awesome debate guru proved how memorable my ultimate rebuttal failure was.
Note : This blog post is part of my 30 Days Microblog Challenge which I began in September 2018. To read more from this series, you can select ‘Microblog’ under Category. Or, search for #therainbowhatmicroblogs on Instagram. 🙂 Topics for this series are a mix of my own brainchild and prompts from my Insta-friends.
The cheeky person who prompted me to write this clearly had first-hand experience of the drama that unfolded during my last days of work in Land of Pichonkun. It was all glitters and rainbows at work before I tendered my short notice resignation (no, it wasn’t. hahaaa!). Surprisingly (also shockingly), it was not as difficult for me to come up with this piece. So, *drum rolls*, here are the 10 most amazing things about my ex-boss which are purely non-fictional (this, I kid you not!). Oh, and we shall name my ex-boss ‘Ex-Boss’ throughout this post (because duhhhhh…) in order to protect their identity.
Prepares incredible presentation slides – prior to meeting Ex-Boss, I mentally thought I was quite good at making presentation decks, but soon enough found out that I was mediocre.
Has a sharp eye for details – almost always able to identify minute errors
Curiosity to learn – if Ex-Boss doesn’t know, Ex-Boss Googles!
Gets the bigger picture of things
Gives random creative ideas – especially we brainstorm on events, activities
Passion for the company – this was Ex-Boss’ first job, and Ex-Boss has dedicated 20-ish years of their life for the organization.
Taught me most of what I know of Safety, Health and Environment (SHE)
Patience for long discussions? – this remains questionable, though
Workaholic
Sort of indirectly got me to start my current attempt to eco-living.
I think this could be a kind reminder to all of us. Let not bitter moments cloud the good in others. Bridges do burn, unfortunately. We can either rebuild the bridge, or simply wish them well from the other side.
All smiles for the camera. 🙂 And look, that’s Pichonkun!
Confession : As I wrote this, I had flashes of Friday afternoons during monthly Environmental Committee Meeting. I am just glad that’s all history now! 😛
Note : This blog post is part of my 30 Days Microblog Challenge which I began in September 2018. To read more from this series, you can select ‘Microblog’ under Category. Or, search for #therainbowhatmicroblogs on Instagram. 🙂 Topics for this series are a mix of my own brainchild and prompts from my Insta-friends.
I think it was a Wednesday, which in UTP, translates to lecture-free second half of the day. I was sitting in Tudung Saji Café, my usual spot by the beam. I was probably doing some assignment or reading as I heard loud chatters approaching me. Someone asked me if I was going for the replacement class, I would’ve nodded, while mentally rolling my eyes. They were all headed to Chancellor Hall, to watch some debate competition, in a large noisy group. I was supposed to collect their quiz papers from class. I mentally mocked them. One of them, a tall boy wearing spectacles, muttered something. They conveniently decided to pass me a bag (one that they give out during orientation) and told me that one of their friends would come get it. I mocked them mentally, again, with a smile on my face. Who even writes their name on their bag with a correction liquid? Owner of the ridiculously tarnished bag came to collect his bag, grinningly.
I went to class that afternoon and collected every quiz paper with an Indian name. I only knew 2-3 of them. After an hour of class, I went back to Tudung Saji. Sometime later, they returned too. This was my opportunity to match names with faces, and possibly intelligence. In coming weeks after that, I made friends with them and was soon part of the big, noisy bunch.
That boy who passed me his friend’s bag always commented on my Facebook posts, texted me, always asked me out for movies and later settled for a KFC lunch circa July 2011. He drove me around, packed suppers and asked me answers for assignments.
Years passed. On a rainy night, I came back to my room exhausted after long hours in IRC. I opened my ‘unofficial email’ which I had only used for my BlogSpot account at that time. First sentence said, ‘I know you won’t see this email for some time’. As I read the email, I knew. I was in love with the boy who wrote me an email with grammatical errors. So, friends, this is how I met and later fell in love with Sarvish.
Earliest snap I have of us, taken in 2011 @ Tudung Saji Cafe
Disclaimer: I have the tendency of reconstructing memories to my preferences, but I also have the gift of vivid memory for minute details.
Note : This blog post is part of my 30 Days Microblog Challenge which I began in September 2018. To read more from this series, you can select ‘Microblog’ under Category. Or, search for #therainbowhatmicroblogs on Instagram. 🙂 Topics for this series are a mix of my own brainchild and prompts from my Insta-friends.
Honestly speaking (ermm, typing), I lack appreciation of Kerala Cuisine. I know little differences between the many South Indian cuisines. BUT, I have an ultimate favourite which is Injipuli (literally translates to Ginger Tamarind). When you attend Malayalee weddings or events, you’d often find this pickle-sort of dish served. If you do, there’s also high probability that you hear an older Malayalee aunty who’s critiquing the dish – needs more brown sugar, ginger pieces too big, colour is just not right shade of spicy red and whatnot. Well, all I know is that Injipuli shall taste however my mother makes it. Because… Amma knows best, and she’s the best cook I know. I’m just a happy kid who’s about to eat her Chinese Economy Rice dinner with a teaspoon of Injipuli on the side. 😬
Amma’s fresh batch of homemade Injipuli, 🙂
Note : This blog post is part of my 30 Days Microblog Challenge which I began in September 2018. To read more from this series, you can select ‘Microblog’ under Category. Or, search for #therainbowhatmicroblogs on Instagram. 🙂 Topics for this series are a mix of my own brainchild and prompts from my Insta-friends.
The Rainbow Hat 